Relationship Advice For Women By Rori Raye - Could You Be Domineering Your Husband’s Role In Your Relationship?
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008 Subscribe To Our Feed
Any woman who has been in a relationship knows that no matter how healthy it is, its not easy . There are any number of stressors in a relationship, but one of the things that can certainly cloud even a healthy relationship is if your husband or boyfriend feels like you are in competition with him as a MAN. That may sound strange, but it’s often something that is happening within a relationship and neither partner even knows it.
When my husband started turning away from me, I went searching for any kind of marriage advice for women I could find. I ended up finding some fabulous relationship advice by Rori Raye. Rori Raye says this problem can arise in any relationships – but especially in those where one partner is fairly competitive. By the time you notice it, it may have already created a chasm between the two of you. Rori Raye describes this problem as “male energy” -an aggressive approach that us women use to achieve great things. In the modern world – women DO need to be hard-hitting and commanding to get what we need often times – but – in a relationship, that spells disaster. As useful as this energy can be in business situations or in the outside world, inside of a relationship – it can ruin things. It boils down to the fact that he is supposed to be the man in your relationship, not you.
Rori Raye says that when he starts to pull away from you, avoiding activities that he may perceive as involving competition, you know that you have a problem. Have you ever interrupted him when he was sharing something that happened to him by cutting in with your own similar story? Did he quit talking then? Or maybe he gets surly and tetchy when you jokingly challenge him to a physical competition - like you tell him (even if you don’t really think so) you could “kick his butt”? When he begins to withdraw from or become short-tempered about activities like this that you once liked doing together, you need to pay attention to what is happening.
It doesn’t take a lot to hurt a guys feeling – or his ego, according to Rori Raye’s relationship advice. Interrupting his tales with tales of your own makes him feel like you are stepping on him, when you should be listening. Cracking jokes at his expense can have the same – even if it is OBVIOUS that you are kidding. There is a fine line between joking and hurting. You have to understand the role that you play in your relationship before you can truly understand why these things are shutting down your relationship.
What he needs is to feel loved, respected and accepted from you. When you stop giving him the love, respect, and recognition he needs, it begins to chip away at his confidence in the relationship. Failing confidence like that can be a poison to any relationship, no matter how good it was in the beginning. If he is unable to trust you to watch out for his feelings and ego, even if he does not KNOW it - he won’t trust you with his heart.
I really took Rori Raye’s relationship advice to heart. I really looked inside MYSELF for the key to this problem, and found it in my own need to be heard and in the habit of being an authority figure in my job. The funny thing is – I like being a leader at my job, but at home – its different – I want HIM to be the man. Yet I was undermining his ability to do so.
This one little piece of marriage advice for women has saved my marriage. By learning to be sensitive to competitive situations and diffusing them through consideration, and celebrating him as a man and a lover, you will find your relationship turning around. By allowing him to shine in his own spotlight and leaving your male energy at work, your partnership will again begin to blossom into a healthy relationship with a good male to female balance.
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